For The Mamas

Happy Mother’s Day, Mamas! A mother and daughter/son relationship is very precious. It also evolves and never looks the same twice as the years go on. From every stage of life, from a newborn to a toddler to an adolescent to a teenager to a young adult, mother and children’s dynamics are dictated by different needs and expectations from both sides. Mother’s begin their journey with all these hopes and dreams for their unborn child’s future. As they grow and experience life’s beauties and challenges for themselves, what children see for their future is now dictated more by their individual personality and decisions, mixed in with parental expectations, boundaries, and those same wishes they hoped for during pregnancy.

From being a daughter myself, there is a shift as you continue to grow up into a young adult and decisions you make, thinking you are doing what’s best for you, might not be seen the same way through your mother’s eyes. At this stage mother’s have to have faith they raised young men and women the right way to face the world on their own. Then it clicks for children when they have children of their own the struggles their moms faced walking that line of parental concern and letting their kids live their lives. All of a sudden the advice we called them names for as an adolescent or even a young adult we realize was just an expression of love and concern.

If we are lucky our moms are around for all of these stages and full circle, are there to see us become parents and go through the relationship rollercoaster for ourselves. Unfortunately, that is not everyone’s story on Mother’s (or Father’s) Day but today we are talking about the mamas. For those not with us we still have your lessons and words of wisdom to pass down through stories, and sometimes music. Mother’s Day is also for the strong women who have stepped up in situations of loss and filled that void for those who lost a parent. The parent/child relationship not only evolves, but it looks different for everyone. Blood might make you related, but love is what makes you a family. There are three artists I am thinking of as I am writing this that have songs on this topic, perfect for a Mother’s Day review. Two from the parent perspective, Rachel Platten and Andy Grammer, and one from the daughter’s perspective Tenille Arts. Let’s dive in!

Rachel Platten ‘You Belong’

Rachel’s song for her first child during pregnancy begins and ends with her child’s heartbeat. There’s so much excitement and anticipation in the lyrics of this song:

I'm patiently waiting for you to arrive

I wanna meet you so much I could cry

I wonder who's hands and who's eyes you will have

I wonder if you're gonna smile like your dad

And nothing you ever do will be so wrong

You belong, you belong

As the song continues Rachel then goes into the hopes and dreams her child will achieve. And even when life gets tough they will be strong enough to get through, but know their mama is always there to pick you back up even when they are not there. .

And I wanna help you be better than me

There won't be a star in the sky you can't reach

I'll wipe off your tears but I'll let them fall first

And I will be brave when you fall and get hurt

I'll show you what love is and all that you're worth

You show me how to put somebody else first

I hope you like music as much as your mom

That you'll understand that I'm there when I'm gone

Rachel Platten ‘Girls’

5 years later Rachel now has two daughters. Three years since her last music release, she has come back more real and vulnerable than ever. Rachel penned a sweet note about the song to her followers:

“...I wrote as a love letter to my two daughters. My intention was to impart a valuable lesson to them - that life is full of highs and lows, and that we should embrace all of its beauty and challenges. I want my daughters to know that they are capable of overcoming any obstacle that comes their way, and that the love and support of their family will always be there for them. Through this song, I hope to inspire women everywhere to be strong, confident, and resilient, and to celebrate the power they hold.”

Similar to ‘You Belong’ the main sentiment of this message to her daughters is to encourage her daughters to live life fearlessly, to chase after what you fall in love with, no matter the high and the lows that come along the way.

Girls you were born to run

To reach the stars and chase the sun

Girls you are wild and free

The wind is at your back, the world is at your feet

The final verse of the song reminds them that family will get them through anything. They will always have a mothers love, but more importantly will have each other to count on.

Hope you always know your worth though I know that life can hurt

Hope you know that you can turn to each other

Hope the road ahead is clear

And I hope you know when I'm not here

That you'll always have the love

Of your mother

Tenille Arts ‘Call You Names’

Tenille Arts also has two songs for her mama. In 2019 her single ‘Call You Names’ describes the evolution of the mother/daughter relationship. From adolescent/teenager years of growing up to young adults when you call them for advice. When they catch you with your first cigarette or sneaking in past curfew they are mean and controlling. However, once you are living on your own and you call for any life question from how to get a wine stain out of the carpet, about everything from heartbreak, rent, to the rain. At that point we call them different names. As Tenille sings:

Now I call you all the names I can think of

That paint you in the most beautiful light

I call you mama, my best friend

My everything 'til the end

I call you my angel

I call you a saint

Yeah, I call you names

Tenille Arts ‘Mama’s Eyes’

Just released May 12th, 2023 Tenille continues the sentiment of the last verse in ‘Call You Names’ with an ode to her mother now that she is a grown adult herself in her new single ‘Mama’s Eyes’. We don’t just call our mamas for recipes or cleaning tricks (even though they usually have the best for both) but the advice we seek and the shoulder to cry on and the unconditional love and support that they give us is just as valuable. She praises her mom for the way she sees the world through her eyes.

She always finds the silver linings, always sees the bigger plan, sees the woman that I can’t, makes every mountain smaller. If I Saw things from her point of view there wouldn’t be anything I couldn’t get through

As Tenille concludes in her song, we all hope to learn the strength and wisdom that our mothers possess, but until then we will look at the world through their eyes, the way they see it and the confidence they have in us for the people we can become and hopefully live up to.

Andy Grammer ‘She’d Say’

Ngiyamkhumbula umama wami

[Zulu: I miss my mom]

Like I said earlier, not everyone is as lucky to have their mom (or dad) in their life long enough to see you grow up or raise kids of your own. Andy Grammer understands this loss when he lost his mom when he was 25. He starts his song with a translation of ‘I miss my mom’ in the South African language Zulu. Since then Andy has become the best ‘Girl Dad’ but when Mother’s Day comes around he always thinks of his mom and how his daughters didn’t get the chance to meet her.

Cuts me up that you will never listen

To the sweet, sweet sound of her voice

I could tell you she was quite the mixture

Of a mama and a shaman and a fiery pistol

Truth is, she's right there in you

She's a part of you, you don't have a choice

The next best thing if you have lost someone is for those who survived them to keep them alive through stories and memories. Which is exactly what Andy writes in ‘She’d Say’ a reminder to his daughters that their late grandmother is always with them and even in each other. Andy will now have this song to sing to his girls to keep his mom alive in their hearts.

She'd say

"You're beautiful, but don't you overplay that card"

She'd say

"You're spiritual, so don't ever forget that part"

She'd say

"You are so much stronger than you even think you are

Let your heart, let your heart lead the way"

That's what she'd say

Andy Grammer ‘Saved My Life’

When we do have big losses like a parent there are always heroes that step up in those moments for people. Mother’s Day isn’t just for the biological mama’s, it is for all the strong women who showed up for people in times of need. Those that raised kids who aren't theirs as their own. Andy Grammer had that in his mother’s best friend and godmother Leigh. Andy said in an interview that Leigh called him during the release and she knew it was Andy’s words and his song, but she felt that it was Andy’s mom thanking her for taking care of Andy when she couldn’t.

I was lost until I saw your halo

I was blind until I saw your light

I believe, oh, friend, we all have angels

And you are mine

I think you should know you saved my life

Seeing Andy sing this song live, multiple times Leigh came on stage with him and he couldn’t even look at her without crying. He actually turned away from her to get through the song. I know I am personally blessed to have had many strong women around me throughout my life. My mama, my aunt Melinda, and Laura I love all three of you. Thank you for stepping up and being there for me back then and always.

So Happy Mother’s Day to all those mamas! To all the strong and powerful women who step up to be there for children from birth, through adolescence, to adulthood when we become parents ourselves. We wouldn’t survive life without you as role models and your guidance. My hope for all is when you hear these songs you pick up the phone and call your mama, because even if you are on the part of the rollercoaster where you are butting heads, you will learn to understand where it all is coming from. Without a doubt a mother’s love is unconditional and speaking as a daughter myself, it does not go unnoticed.

With love,

Rockin Rox